Reflections on Things Lost
Topic: Mysteries of Life


With all of the calamities and disasters occurring in the country both in the past and in the present it gives me pause to think about how absolutely fragile life is. The idea of some sort of permanence in the world, some sort of solid and surefooted present and future which is not real in the first place, becomes more evident in it's absence. Buddhist as I am, I know nothing is permanent. Everything is impermanent especially life itself. With nothing permanent in life some things remain important if only because of how fragile and ephemeral those things are. People, friends and relatives are always there even when gone, even when not seen for years. People you think about every single day and haven't seen for years are always there. Always and forever a part of your life.

I had this dream once. I have this dream often. I'm doing something, something else entirely like browsing in a library and I see someone who sees me. Someone I know. Someone who knows or knew me. I feel the scorn and disgust from them and I flee. Never a word, just the feeling that sends me fleeing and to suddenly awaken. I have to explain, whenever I have dreams it's not like I have dreams far from reality. Dreams of my own reality and not dreams as I wish them to be. Just reinforcements of reality. I wish I had dreams of monsters chasing me or falling but I get this one instead. I never have a chance to do anything in this dream, no way to change the outcome, it's predetermined. I awaken with my heart pounding and with a sadness that wraps around me.

I had that dream last night. Quite vivid and real. Only this time the person wasn't mad at me. And actually spoke to me. The feeling was intense, my surprise and gratefulness was overwhelming. I wanted to speak, to say something but as in life my words would not come. My heart raced and I was suddenly awake. I felt great, a wonderful feeling. And it wasn't real. I never did say I was sorry. And I was. And I am.

Being Held Accountable


Listening to the news and to the commentators in the wake of Katrina you can hear the usual suspects begin their various political spins. I heard Sean Hannity put the desperate rant by the Mayor of New Orleans on his show as an example of partisan 'Bush Bashing' and I couldn't believe it. If anyone has a right to scream and yell and wonder where the hell the help was it was the Mayor of New Orleans. But what's right and what passes for common sense doesn't apply any longer in this word of balkanized politics. For Hannity and others of his ilk their party line is all that matters. Much like the stuff I would listen to on Radio Moscow which had often had no basis in reality these guys are singing their political song no matter what the reality is. Hannity, in the tried and true style of politics set about to discredit the Mayor, after all, it was the Mayor who didn't get all those people who wouldn't evacuate to evacuate. So, according to Hannity the man has no right to complain. Again, it reminds me of Radio Moscow and the parade of lies they would put out over the airwaves. Him and Rush also said that 'this is no time to criticize' since it's the middle of a crisis. Oh, I see. We can't be expected to be able to multitask at all. Sorry, but it is possible to work and focus on the efforts and to criticize those efforts where they are failing. Oops, trick no good dudes. I know they don't want to hear it but this time those who screwed up will be found out and will be booted out. It doesn't matter what party they are from and it doesn't matter to us which political party is running things. Things just need to be run at least half assed. At least. I don't know what party the Governor of Louisiana is from. Does it matter? She is not competent and deserves the scorn she is getting now and will continue to get. Bush, who went to a fund raising dinner the night that Katrina hit the coast and who fiddled away important days until the constant news coverage shamed him into acting deserves the loss of support he is experiencing. We don't expect our politicians to be perfect, we do expect a certain level of competence and this level isn't acceptable. This failure isn't acceptable. But you will continue to hear Rush and Hannity make it sound like things are getting much better in New Orleans and along the Gulf Coast. Not going to work this time. You're not going to get to pass this buck back to Clinton or Carter or FDR.

Horror in New Orleans
I've been watching the events in New Orleans and I'm horrified with it. The government has completely failed and has absolutely let events get out of hand. It's Lord of the Flies there, it's like hell on earth and there will not be an easy end to it now. Even after they get all of the people out of New Orleans that want to leave or who will be most easily forced to leave they will have to move into the town with military force. The gangs of homeless violent men who have found a world where they are lords of all they can grab will not easily give it up. In their predatory lawless minds they inherited the wasteland that has been left to them. The police let them loot and they then looted with a vengence. Guns out of the Wal-Mart's and more posessions than they've ever seen have fueled visions of being able to be masters of their own fate. They've organized along the gang structure that they've already had or have gathered along similar interests and have indeed gone back to a primordial lawless evilness. Shooting at helicopters, rape gangs, shooting to settle old scores in a world without law and without consequences the place and the people bring shame to us all.

Steaming pile of MTV
Topic: Art and Poetry

Flipping channels. Ricky Martin 'pumping' up the crowd. Momentary blindness caused by massive suckage. Must change channel. Flip back to Hurricane coverage. Watch the spinning red hurricane in the bottom of the screen. Flip back to MTV, is that Jamie Foxx rapping? What the @#$%? I know he was in the biopic of Ray Charles but how does that make him qualify to be singing on MTV? At least Ricky Martin sold some records to the Mall crowd first before they let him shake his bon bon. Why didn't Jamie Foxx have to go on American Idol first? Or on that show looking to find a new singer for the INXS? On that show where Gene Simmons is trying to Jack Black a bunch of British school kids and turn them into a band? Oh thank god, it's over. Back to commercials for the OC and for jeans. Let's check to see if that little spinning hurricane on the news channel is getting any closer to New Orleans.

Um let's see. Flipped back to the MTV disaster, you know. It's only right to spend time with as many disasters as possible when they are simulcasted as they seem to be right now. The MTV thing, which looks really like a BET at the improv thing, is showing 50 cents rapping some rap which I couldn't identify since they are all basically the same beat with every other word being bleeped. It's a sad state of affairs when that is identified as music when it's clearly more closely related to beat poetry and bad beat poetry at that. Well, no music to be seen at that disaster, only bad production values, unrehearsed unprepared presenters and people trying to show how cool they are by being bleeped as often as possible. How sad. But there is still the flaming red tiny hurricane eternally spinning at FOX News and CNN. Various anchors are racing to be in harms way and there is the hope that one of them might get waxed on camera. It might finally provide proof that ego isn't magic armor- followed by the serious reflections about how wise it is to put reporters in the way of storms followed by self affirmed discussions about how important they are and how they need to be where the news is. Blah blah blah.

Storm rising
Now Playing: Nena - 99 Luftballons
Topic: Mysteries of Life


This is a picture of the Gulf Coast last week. Near on 100 degrees and a 100 percent humidity. Told you I could live in heat and humidity. Not only that, but what you can't see is that I'm wearing black. NOthing but. This week it's all rain and clouds and general doom. There's a reason after all why it started as swamp land. But this storm seems to be heading for New Orleans and since New Orleans is below sea level it has the possibility of being very very bad. If you're evacuating New Orleans don't forget all yor Mardi Gras beads and whatever you do, don't look back - you could turn into a pillar of salt. We'll see about that.

Just watched the Denver Bronco's defeat the Indianapolis Colts. Bronco's look good, Mike Anderson looks good as the starting running back with a nifty 93 yard touchdown run. With all the hopefulness that comes with pre-season I'm hopeful for this year. I've always believed that you should confine your irrational belief to sport - irrational faith in the possibility of success against all odds, irrational belief in redemption and rebirth, irrational belief that hard work and effort can help you find your way to eventual success. Like John Elway. Like Lance Armstrong.

Pop Beaver
Now Playing: Rebecca Pidgeon - Tangerine / Lena Marlin - My Lucky Day
Topic: Mysteries of Life

I was of course unable to do anything but take pictures of the Pop Beaver. The Pop Beaver, one of 24 various Beaver incarnations which will all find their way here eventually. Three solid weeks of 'Beaver Shot of the Day' pictures if I was of a mind. I captured some pictures of one of the Beavers at an intersection and my eyes went to a amused driver who watched me take pictures of that particular Beaver. I smiled and said to him, 'Now who doesn't love Beavers? I mean, a man's gotta have something wrong with him if he doesn't like Beavers.' The smiling and amused fellow from the car nodded in agreement. Perhaps it's not world peace but you know, one Beaver at a time and I'm pretty sure that world peace will take care of itself. One Beaver at a time. Yes indeed, now that's something I can get behind. Thank you Pop Beaver.

Oh, and please note the admonishment at the bottom left hand corner. The green sign there says "Please do not Touch or Climb the Beaver."

Ah, Fred Astaire
Now Playing: Roger Miller - Little Green Apples
Topic: Art and Poetry


My pre-ordered dvd boxset of Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers movies came a few days ago. I'm not old enough to have seen any of these movies in the theater but I did see them back in the days of three networks and one independent television channel. That great independent channel had a library of old black and white movies and it was from those days that I'd be able to turn on the tv and see the great old movies of the 30's, 40's and 50's. I grew up watching these movies and I grew up loving them. I mention this because when I see Fred Astaire I know I'm going to see a light hearted, dancing, romantic comedy which will entertain me and really make me feel good. I'm going to be happy.

As I read this review of the box set on Cinematical I am so very glad that I'm not looking at them through the eyes of a movie critic. I'm so very glad that I didn't think to see marriage as "disappointment’s nihilist revenge" or see the character that Ginger Rogers played as "emblematic of a “new kind of woman” " I'm not looking at Fred Astaire/Ginger Rogers movies through a woman's studies degree or a politically correct filter of what I should think was intended or should have been intended of a movie created over 70 years ago. I'd like to think there is still a place for movies to be enjoyed as movies.

Swing Time is light hearted. It's wonderfully light hearted. It's fantasy time with beautifully dressed people who dance for their supper in fantastic art deco inspired sets and who don't get angry when they lose the girl but who pick themselves up and come up smiling. There is magic in these old movies. As the trailer for Swing Time says, Singing! Dancing! Romancing! What more could you want?

20 miles and Reeds Ginger Brew
Now Playing: Mediaeval Baebes - Mirabilis
Topic: Physical Well Being
Been hitting the bike trails for twenty miles every other day and today was no except to that. Had a deer cross my path the other day which was an unexpected pleasure. My new fixation (my old fixation being lime flavored tic-tacs) is Reeds Ginger Brew. A premium soda made in California and it comes in a version with 17 grams of ginger per bottle or 28 grams for the extra strong version. A strong tangy taste that bites back. I can't get enough of them and of course I have the devils own time trying to find and keep them. I've also continued the ginger flavor parade by finding Ginger flavored Altoids. Great stuff.

I Hate Crappy Movies
Now Playing: Indiscreet - Cary Grant and Ingrid Bergman
Topic: Art and Poetry
One of the themes often discussed these days in entertainment news is the fact that fewer people are going to movie theaters. If you listen to people who make movies the great hue and cry is that it's downloading of movies that is causing the problems. Evil 'Pirates' they cry. This is nonsense of course, folks who are interested enough to download movies are the ones who go to those movies, crappy or not. They are the ones who buy the dvd's when they come out and they are the ones who are enthusiastic about new movie releases. Nope, people are not going to movies at the rate they used to for a number of reasons and one of them isn't downloaders.

So many reasons for not going to the movies. High ticket prices is one good reason to keep away from crowded theaters full of loud teenagers and crying babies. A five dollar bag of popcorn and a five dollar soda doesn't make a lot of friends either. And of course now they have a half hour commercial before the movie, followed by a few more commercials to include the stupid 'do not download' commercials which insult the intelligence of anyone with intelligence. A ticket for one person who also buys something to drink costs the same as buying the dvd a few months later. If I'm interested at all I'm waiting for the dvd.

Another thing that puts a foul taste in my mouth about the movies is that they have become as obnoxious and annoying as political campaigns. You can't escape hearing about the 'Dukes of Hazzard' movie and about every tiny aspect of Jessica Simpson's life right now. The publicity machine responsible for this crap continues to grind so that we hear about it on every news broadcast, entertainment news broadcast, print news and Internet news. Somehow half of the commercials include references to the movies via their tie-in promotions. It's practically inescapable. And annoying as hell. Presently I'm just waiting for Friday to come, like election day it means a certain kind of freedom from the constant barrage of crap and hype. Then the greatest movie ever made, the spectacular movie everyone has been waiting for can become the under performing piece of crap that it really is. And it can sink back down into the mire from which it came. And then of course the next movie hype for the next festering, steaming pile of horse manure can blot out the sun with everyone shilling it as the best thing since sliced bread. The problem for the movie makers is that the word gets out almost before the movie gets out. A piece of crap, no matter how many bubbling interviews with the cast by Entertainment Tonight will still be a piece of crap and everyone, with a click of their computer mouse will find out about it before going to the theater with their ten bucks a ticket in hand. So bombs don't even get to make their money back. Crap is no longer King. The jig is up and the ones who make crap aren't rewarded for their inability to make a good movie. Good. But still and all they will whine and scream and point the finger at anyone and everything rather than where it belongs. At themselves.

I like going over to Rotten Tomatoes here where I can watch graphically the rise and fall of the movies of crap. I especially enjoyed watching that steaming pile 'Stealth' drop to 11% liking the movie. I haven't seen a opinion level that low. I especially dislike Jessica Biel as I remember her being one of the horrific things wrong with Blade III. Her as a fighter pilot is as unbelievable as is the idea that Living Color comedian Jamie Foxx would or could be one. Right off the bat I know I'm never going to see this, rent it or buy it. Some things ooze a foul stench long before you even have a chance to read a review. In fact, the best part of this movie is reading the witty and derisive reviews of it.

And in keeping with the 'Dukes of Hazzard' theme here I can see on www.rottentomatoes.com that this movie has dropped to 'rotten' and continues to fall. Another stinker. What a surprise.

30 Miles in the heat
Topic: Physical Well Being
Burnt to a crisp and stretched out today for some thirty miles. Don't mind that part but you know, I might as well had put a teabag in my water bottle since the water was as hot as a cup of tea without the flavor. I don't drink hot tea so there's nothing for it. It's hot water on those hot hot days on those days far from other water supplies. It's still great, the cardinals, bluebirds, jays, yellow finches, bunny rabbits, groundhogs, deer, racoons, and everything else that passes along the road to populate the trip. A bit too much sun which I'm paying for now but what the heck. It's all good.

20 Miles on the Bike and being Port Scanned
A nice bike ride today for twenty miles worth. Smooth and easy work.

Also noticing that I'm being scanned often from a Asian site. Didn't come up on normal whois and had to go to Asian registry lookup. A Shanghai IP 61.152.158.125 which seems to bounce me often when I make any blog articles about China. Then I get various attacks, cache poisoning and such. I get these stupid email phishing attacks from 'administrator@gadlaw.com', 'members support from mail@gadlaw.com', and 'info@gadlaw.com' telling me to view some attached file and 'fix' my information so that I can access my email at 'gadlaw.com' - So asinine and retarded. I am gadlaw.com and there is no administrator, member support, or any other body of people other than me who is in charge of my info. Just stop already. Not even funny. But of course it's some script running from zombie machines - the email crap that is. The port scanning from the Shanghai ip is sad as well. I mean, it's not like I'm NORAD or a defense computer or anything interesting and worthy of being scanned. Don't keep personal info on the computer, don't have copies of all my home porn movies I've made of myself with various supermodels. It's just stupid. Ahh, whatever.

Tour de France and general cycling
Now Playing: Dawn and Drew Show
Topic: Physical Well Being


A rest day on the Tour de France after the Hincapie win. Excellent day of racing and it was heartwarming to see the loyal Hincapie win his first stage after six plus years of working for Lance. Those two had been friends since they were 14 and 16 years old and you know it's just nice to see. The Austrian who won the day before hadn't won before either and he cried at the end of the race. He had gone wire to wire in the lead and when the race was over he could not even stand up. Every ounce of the energy he had went into that race and at the end he was completely spent. Amazing effort for him. Amazing effort for Hincapie the next day as well. Hincapie was part of a 14 man break that was about 20 minutes ahead and riders kept falling off the end but not Hincapie. He was at the front initially to be there to help Lance if and when he came to the front. Lance and his main rivals didn't get that far so Hincapie was allowed to work for himself and won in a sprint at the end. Did I mention monster mountains? Just amazing. Joyous.

Went out and biked today, 20 miles worth. Very relaxing and an opportunity for bike zen for the first half. After that I looked up and saw a big old thunderhead sneaking up. Yikes. I turned myself around and just pounded 4 miles on a high gear. And you know, that cold rush of air came over. The leading edge of a storm is a windy, cold thing. It was awesome, the trees bent over and then they were crushed again by the next wave of cold air. I was doomed. Darkness was suddenly there and so was the rain. Lord it came down. I tried to hide under some trees for a while and felt completely cut off from the world. Annoyed and getting wetter by the minute I figured it wasn't going to stop any time soon. I started hearing limbs of trees snapping off and flying through the air. Wow, a mini tornado or wind shear. Waited a minute for that big wind to die down a bit then said to heck with it and started back down the path. I heard a sound like someone ripping dry papers over some loud speakers. Figured that was a power line coming down and it was just sizzling. Yikes again. Dodging felled tree branches, big ones, and being pelted by rain I eventually quit feeling sorry for myself and just pedaled away. When I got right in my head over it I wasn't cold and miserable any longer and was just pedaling. It was great. Saw bikers hiding under trees and being miserable and I just smiled and waved as I went by. Reminded me of another time when I remember running in the pouring rain and I realize I've only ever had great moments out in the rain. All good.

The last thing of course, I'm listening to the Dawn and Drew Show, a podcast. It's grown on me and it's fun to listen to. That and TWIT, diggcast and Chris Pirillo are the ones I listen to. It's always fun to listen to others and to look for interesting and fun efforts.

No Emmy Nominations for Gilmore Girls
Now Playing: Chris Pirillo Show
Topic: Mysteries of Life
It's been a long time in my life since I've had any belief in any sort of awards as a reference for what is good and what I should think is good. Same thing goes for lists of 'Greatest Americans' or 'Best Movies of all Time' or '100 Most Beautiful People.' It's all opinion at best, blatant commercialism, issue driven support or some mixture of the three.

Nobel Peace Prizes, Nobel prizes in science. Yes indeed, that's the gold standard of awards. Well we all know Yassar Arafat got a Nobel Peace Prize and he never renounced the use of terror. A Nobel Prize was awarded to Egas Moniz in 1936. here That person got the Prize for doing and promoting lobotomies. Well so much for the worth of the Nobel Prize. The best you can say about it is that it sometimes gets the science awards wrong and it's 'Peace' prize awards are skewed to the left and toward the sensibilities of the political left. When I was young and lacking knowledge about the real nature of the world I thought a Peace Prize was something to be admired and that the winners of such a prize must be great people. Fortunately I didn't stay in the dark about these things and now I know Nobel Prizes are issue driven opinion and an opinion I don't agree with.

Things like the tripe put out by magazines and television shows where they advertise the 100 most beautiful people or funniest comedians are fairly harmless exercises in idiot entertainment. They tend to be reflections of the lack of depth and knowledge of the list builders and unfortunately they perpetuate that lack of depth and understanding. You know, any list of the funniest comedians which has Chris Rock on it is profoundly wrong. Those kind of lists as they are seen on TV involve unfunny comedians and personalities you don't know giving uneducated and uninteresting opinions about people they usually don't know and never heard of. You can imagine these lists being made by 18 year old interns who only have a bare remembrance of anything that happened in the last ten years let alone any historical or personal knowledge about whatever subject they pontificate on. Those lists can't be taken seriously at all and are best ignored.

Now the entertainment awards are definitely political, commercial self promotion. The 'Best' Motion Picture of the year is usually a unwatchable bag of haggish. Shakespeare in Love - 1998. Need I say more? Proves my point. A more worthless bag of warm spit you'll never see. But, it did win the Academy Award for best picture. So it must be good right? Only if you are an Entertainment Tonight watching and obeying zombie.

Which brings me to the Gilmore Girls. A better show on TV you will never have seen. Great writing and great acting. Better than most anything you will see on the TV presently being produced. Did the show get a nomination? Ha, surely you jest. What's good isn't the criteria. Boobies and cursing of course are the most important criteria - which explains most of the HBO nominations. Which also explains the Desperate Housewives nominations. Gilmore Girls has regular women without exposed boobies so you know, nothing worthy of notice. Thank goodness I know what I like and have an idea of what is good without listening to the award shows or best of lists.

Mother Nature is actually a Beaver - Really
Now Playing: NIN - With Teeth
Topic: Physical Well Being
Personally I always pictured Mother Nature as a woman with long flowing hair. Flowers in said hair and just generally a lot of flowing stuff all around. Well, here it seems Mother Nature is Beaver of undetermined gender with some suet in one hand, birds and small fluffy animals on his/her shoulders and at his/her feet. Who knew. Saw this vision while on my 40 mile bike ride today. A very long ride on a very sore behind. The thighs were fine but you know, I think I will replace the seat with a softer, more friendly seat. Only two guys passed me by and they had some professional looking bike race jerseys on. I'm sure they bought them at the bike store but it worked for them today. Didn't see them again so they were obviously the quick and done kind of guys. I have a philosophical problem with being a quick and done kind of guy so I always try to do the distances. Keeps me from having to go so quickly. :-)

Uncle Sam Goose


Uncle Sam the Goose speaks for himself. A quiet dignity. A sense of history and accomplishment. He (or she) stands there in mute testimony to the greatness of the United States of America. Goose bless America!